Why I Draw Mandalas?

The short answer to that is because I can and I like it 😃

But really, there is a bit of truth to that statement. I have always told myself that I can't draw. I don't really know where this belief came from. Maybe from myself. I was always drawing doodles and patterns at school when we had to listen to something for a long time. The teacher would read a story, I drew in my book. The teacher would explain something multiple times, I would draw. My pencil case was completely covered in small drawings. I was told it looked messy, that I wasn't good at looking after my things, and I always promised myself I wouldn't draw on all my belongings next year... it lasted until the very first drawing. The others were praised for their drawings of princesses and action figures, for how closely they resembled the thing they were trying to draw. I wasn't good at that, or rather, it didn't interest me to draw another girl in another skirt. It took too much brainpower for me and I would constantly overthink it. The fact was that I hadn't found my style yet.

After a period of stress, I consulted a clairvoyant. I doubted everything and didn't know which way to turn. I arrived at a lovely house; a warm, smiling woman opened the door and welcomed me into a cosy room. It felt like the hug I needed at that time. The session began, and she said I could record it if I wanted. It felt so safe. She started tuning in, describing my situation, and she really nailed it. She said more and more things that were spot on, and I could feel it. At one point she said, ‘You need to find peace, and something that relaxes you’ – a bit vague, I thought. I asked her, ‘What is that?’ and she said, promptly, ‘Drawing.’ I almost laughed. Clearly she didn't know what she was talking about – I couldn't draw. I should add that I have seen her a few times since, because, goodness, she was right about so many things.

Back to the ‘I can't draw’ belief – I thought, what the hell, I'll try it. I picked up a pen and started doodling, saw some Facebook posts about patterns, and was intrigued by the term Zentangle and its small format – so relaxing! It was easy to start with too: no result, no right or wrong. But soon I found the small squares constricting, as though the square were just another box I needed to fit into. So I went rogue and started drawing circles instead, or filling whole A4 sheets with patterns – though I still felt it wasn't quite enough.

Drawing!

And suddenly, everything I'd learned at school about geometry (and forgotten again) just unlocked, and I started making mandalas without any training. It felt like home. My very first drawing with circles was a jumble of overlapping shapes, and while filling them in with patterns, I spotted a Pac-Man chasing a red circle. I coloured it in, and that became the first drawing to show my love of circles – and my creativity. For more than ten years, it has hung on the wall in my studio to remind me of who I am.

A four-day mandala course came to my attention, and it was even in my town – I had to go! What appealed to me was that it looked at mandalas from different angles: spiritually, psychologically and artistically. That course led me to a community that still meets once a year to immerse ourselves in the world of mandalas from every angle.

Mandalas are endless – each one is unique, yet still feels like part of a bigger picture. They are a window to yourself, and every so often I find the solution to a problem while drawing one. I once lost my wedding ring; I drew it as a mandala, and two weeks later it turned up in one of my jacket pockets. How about that! I find that putting a challenge into a mandala helps me let go, and lets a higher power do its work. Call it manifestation.

Drawing repetitive patterns calms my mind, and that in itself is an achievement. Mandalas are my go-to whenever the world and everyday life become too overwhelming.

So why do I draw them? Because creating mandalas is a necessity for me – almost as essential as breathing. A colleague once said to me, ‘You are a person who tries to create order out of chaos,’ and I think that's exactly what I do. With every new mandala, there is a little more order in the world. And I put my overactive mind towards something larger than myself, which helps me feel that I'm not carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders. I know I'm not – but life can feel that way sometimes.

My mandala journey continues, and I know other people can benefit from mandalas too – if I can inspire just one person, I'll feel I've fulfilled my mission. Inspiring even more would mean the world to me.

You too can get inspired – sign up to my Bi-weekly Mandala Journal.

Hope to see you there!